I watched significant portions of two NFL Europe games this weekend. I guess that’s a sign of how much I miss football. There are some cool things in the NFLE, though. I saw a field goal which was worth four points. No, it’s not the metric scoring system over there. If it’s more than 50 yards, the kick is worth an extra point. I also saw a wide receiver act as a long snapper. Weird. It also seems like they swtich QBs around during the game there a lot more. Guys there are hoping they can repeat the success of past players or would probably settle for just grabbing a roster spot on a real NFL team. Still months before training camps open. What will tide me over most though, will be the July 13 release of NCAA 2005 and the August 17 release of Madden 2005. I sold my old copies off so I have no choice to wait patiently for these to finally come out. Maybe I’ll get City of Heroes to tide me over till July 13.

Around the National. Football. League…
Jeff Blake looks like he has finally found a new home. Good for him. He’s been on the short end of the stick almost every place he’s gone. Cut from a crappy Cardinals team to make way for McCown, replaced by a younger, faster Aaron Brooks while injured in New Orleans, and worst of all, sent packing to make way for Akili Smith, worst third overall pick in the NFL ever, the future of the Cincinnati Bengals. Yeah, good call there. Anyway, the Eagles now have a very good third QB and hopefully this will get #8 one step closer to returning to the Shake and Blake glory days.

Oh, good. The NFL is talking about putting a team in L.A. Again. That’s just what we need: to wrest a franchise from a market with a fan base decades old and transplant it somewhere where the city won’t even notice, let alone care. Hopefully, it’s just lip service to light a fire under some stadium deals. All I can say is, it’s nice not having my team rumored to be leaving town for once.

Not only will the Super Bowl winner get the Lombardi trophy, but the Thursday night season opener the following year, as well. This opener will be preceded by a special pregame event at the upcoming Super Bowl site. Details are vague at this point but I’m pretty sure Janet, Miss Jackson if you’re nasty, will not be invited.

It’s too early to grade this year’s draft, but you can look back a few years to see why the Seahawks are one of the favorites in the NFC. When it comes to the Bengals, I disagree with his assessment that the Bengals first pick in 2001, Justin Smith, can be considered a bust. While he hasn’t set the league on fire, he has been a solid starter and come up with some big plays. Although, he did heap praises on us for picking up Chad and Rudi Johnson (no relation) that year. The story also points out that when San Diego gets the first overall pick, they get their picture next to the definition of “no-win situation” in Webster’s dictionary.

“Who was it that said when in Rome do as the Romans do?”
“That was Rome not Paris. This is Paris and you’re drunk.”

The last time you went to the theater, do you remember the movies that were previewed before the feature presentation? If so, you saw a good trailer. The problem is, most of the trailers are too good. They make you think even the stinkiest of films is good or show you basically the whole movie in about three minutes. Very few places create new material for the trailer (unlike this Anchorman PSA) so they cut a highlight package of their picture.

Probably my favorite trailer or teaser was actually for The Shadow. The theater is completely black and there’s nothing on the screen. Then, a voice comes over the speakers: “Who knows what evil lurks in the hearts of men?” Still nothing on screen. A movie theater never seemed so dark before. The deep voiced guy (deeper and creepier than the linked sound) said some more stuff, then they put up the Shadow logo and release date. It was pretty eerie and a fantastic homage to the character’s radio history. What’s your most memorable trailer/teaser?

“Sometimes you have to break the rules to free your heart.”
“You got that from a movie poster.”
“Well… when there’s nothing left to believe in, believe in hope.”
“Where’d you get that?”
“From the producers of Waiting to Exhale.”

Some new sneak peaks are out for DC’s big Identity Crisis event. And like all good previews, it creates more questions then answers.

“I believe that is we stayed together as a team, we could be a force that could truly work for the ideals of peace and justice.”
“What, like a bunch of Superfriends?”
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TV Guide released their Top 25 Cult Shows of All Time. Fun list. I was pleased to the see the short-lived Profit get some love on their honorable mention list. Some interesting choices on the Top 25. Obviously, there are some no brainers: Star Trek, X-files, and other sci-fi staples. The biggest surprises to me were Pee Wee Playhouse (#10) above Dr. Who (#18), the amount of “chick shows” on there (My So Called Life, Beauty and the Beast, Absolutely Fabulous), Forever Knight getting a mention, and what the heck is Mary Hartman, Mary Hartman?

“Your use of language has altered since our arrival. It is currently laced with, shall we say, more colorful metaphors, ‘double dumb-ass on you’ and so forth. “

Tomorrow, The Day After Tomorrow opens. Man, that’s confusing to read. Anyway, TDAT star Jake Gyllenen… Jake Gillillill… Tobey Maguire’s look-alike has been pretty close to being in a lot of super-hero movies. He almost filled in for Tobey if he had been out of Spidey 2 due to injury. I could see that, but would have a hard time picturing him as Batman or Superman, as other rumors indicated. Alas, it also appears he will not be Green Hornet cause director Kevin Smith is so darn sloooooow. The one thing I will always picture Jake as is Bubble Boy. And that’s not a bad thing!

New Fantasic Four movie news including a Blue Crush casting rumor for Sue Storm, the Invisible Woman. Also Brendon Fraser would be a very manly choice to play Mr. Fantastic himself, Reed Richards. Interesting choices. Although, I’m starting to get concerned about the direction they might take this. Some people have been quoted as saying this would be a funny, family film. If they mean an adventure movie with moments of levity aimed at a general audience, okay. If we’re talking Thunderbirds remake, I’m out.

More desparaging news for those of us that wanted a quality Superman movie. When someone looks at the script and says, “think Tomb Raider,” that is not a good sign. “No story, all action.” Um… did we see the same movie? Tomb Raider was no story, no action either. Back to Supes, as soon as I heard the guy who directed Charlie Angels: Full Throttle was doing this film, I knew it would be a stinker. Who knows, maybe getting Johnny Depp on board could salvage this eventual dud.

“I thought moms we’re supposed to be nice, and sweet, and patient. I know loan-sharks that are more forgiving than you… Your husband ain’t dead, lady, he’s hiding.”

Big week. The creator of Buffy and Angel tackles the X-Men. Nick Fury’s Secret War continues. And Wizard previews Avengers Dissassemble where the first casualty appears to be…

“Remember when this place was just flame-thowers and rotating knives? I miss that.”
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That’s the sound of the clock ticking down on the final hour of the third season of 24. Almost every episode is full of shocks and suspense and last night’s finale is no exception. Looking down the horizon, there’s a lot of changes in the works. Considering that most of the elements that supported the show the last three years have run dry, I’m all in favor of some tweaks taking place before new episodes start again in January. Not only will this allow for an uninterrupted string of episodes (barring any presidential addresses) but the plans call for a two hour premiere, finale, and one more two hour “event” somewhere in the middle, probably in February. Alright, let’s get spoilerific!

“I have killed two people since midnight. I haven’t slept in over 24 hours. So maybe you should be a little more afraid of me than you are now.”
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Memorial Day is this Monday and the Reds are still not eliminated from the playoffs. They beat my expectations. Since everyone stayed healthy and the pitchers have exceeded anyone’s wildest expectations, they’ve swept the Astros and moved into first place in the NL Central. How about that? And Ken Griffey, Jr. (remember him?) is resurrecting his Hall of Fame hopes now that he’s only 9 home runs from the 500 plateau. Hopefully, the fact that I’m acknowledging their progress does not jinx their good start. And now, here’s some Other Assorted Crap:

Speaking of starts…
More info about Warren Ellis’s Ultimate Nightmare starring some X-Men, Ultimates, and Sam Wilson (the Falcon) that revolves around the giant, mysterious crater in Tunguska, Russia that may or may not have been the result of a comet collision, anti-matter explosion, or alien spacecraft crash. Probably the comet one but that probably wouldn’t make good drama.

Speaking of good drama…
The third season of 24 wraps up tonight. Of course, I’ll put out my reaction to it later this week, whether anyone wants it or not. I brought it up earlier, but when it comes to season finales, the one that stands out the most is the Star Trek: Next Generation episode, “Best of Both Worlds“, where Captain Picard is kidnapped and transformed into Locutus of Borg. Commander Riker has a weapon at his disposal that could destroy the Borg. Of course, having the captain over there complicates things. But he decides, for the sake of the Federation, he has to sacrifice Picard. “Fire,” Riker says. Then the screen dissolves to a “to be continued…” and you had to wait all summer long to see what would happen. It probably helped that it was never done before on this show and not tried again. It really stands out. Any other good season finales?

Speaking of cliffhangers…
X-Men 3 and 4 will apparently be filmed at the same time. It’s probably a good call. It’ll probably cut down on costs, be easier for the major players to get on the same schedule, and keep Hugh Jackman as Wolverine a little longer. With the gigantic financial success of Van Helsing, this is a guy that doesn’t want to get tied down to an ensemble franchise. I bet he’ll do these two and be out. It’ll also allow for a more cohesive storyline between the two movies. And then we’ll see exactly what was that image all about that we saw at the end of X2.

Speaking of comic book movies…
This is not a real or sanctioned one, but one done by a fan, apparently. You can tell because a movie based on a DC character takes several presidential administrations to get done. Also, the character chosen would be a bit far down Warner Brother’s list: Green Arrow I haven’t checked it out yet but maybe it will be as cool as that Batman: Dead End movie that was circling the net last year.

Speaking of stuff you won’t see the big boys put out…
Bad news for those who are hoping for Spider-Man and His Amazing Friends and other Marvel cartoons coming out on DVD. It doesn’t look like the rights-holders are making any moves to release these classics. To this very day, I can still hear the Spider-Friends theme song in my head plus the haunting Hulk theme from the show that would follow.

Speaking of… um, stuff I like…
The Firefly movie, Serenity, will begin filming next week. I still am keeping my fingers crossed we will get to see this one day. It’s a good sign that this project is going to be before the cameras. However, a lot of movies get shot but then sit on a shelf gathering dust. Hopefully, this will make it to a theater near me or even straight to DVD. Whatever it takes to get to see Mal and his crew again. Man, that was a great show.

Speaking of shows…
Apparently, I am the only person in the world that doesn’t follow this, but tonight is when Fox crowns the next American Idol. A few months ago, I predicted who the next American Idol would be and it still looks like I am right: William Hung. Trust me, whatever chick wins tonight will have a weak career that will not hold a candle to the staying power of Hung. You laugh, but you know I’m right. (Or maybe you’re just laughing cause I said “hung.”) Come back in five years, you will still know who Hung is. You’ll struggle to remember tonight’s “winner.”

“The captain is a good fighter, he probably knows how to use a sword, right?”
“I think he knows which end to hold.”

I’ve had almost a week to digest the season finale of Smallville and I needed that much time. I think every single main character except one had a dangling plotline. An interesting theory on “why” that is up at Peter David’s place. While Angel went out “Butch and Sundance” style, (or so I’m told, never seen it) Smallville’s third season definately rips off “Godfather.” (or so I’m told, never seen it) Not sure which part, the one where there’s opera music and everyone gets offed.

When it comes to Smallville, there have been some strange parrallels to the Superman movies. The actress who played Lana Lang now plays Clark’s mom. Superman himself now playes a Dr. Stephen Hawkings-type character. And the voice of Jor-el, Clark’s birth father, is the same who uttered the infamous line that is refenced in the title: “Come, son of Jor-el! Kneel before Zod!” Although, maybe that’s intentional. Hmmm… Click on the “continued” part for more spoiler-specific stuff.

“Only one thing alive with less than four legs can hear this frequency and that’s you.
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Wizard is conducting their latest comics convention in Philadelphia this weekend. As always with a Wizard World event, lots of news coming out of there. Don’t be too surprised if it’s mostly “pops and buzzes” to you as Johnny says. Mostly fanboy stuff.

More on the upcoming Avengers Dissassemble event. “New characters who have never been Avengers before will be in the new lineup for the team. ” My guess is Power Man Luke Cage and Daredevil. Although, it might only be one of them. Comics Continuum implied that only one new member would be on the team. Maybe Blade. Both sources say he is scheduled to appear in a book that is not his own later this year. The new line-up will consist of 5 - 14 characters. Apparently, Dissassemble might mean a major change for Spidey. But, considering he has to appear in three or four other titles a month, I doubt it will last long. In the article, vague positive responses were given about the possibility of Thunderbolts returing, maybe New Warriors, maybe Moon Knight, and the current Captain Marvel living on after his Peter David written series is cancelled. Other news includes good news for fans Ultimate Elektra, Doctor Spectrum, Dr. Strange, Black Widow, Ghost Rider, Black Panther, and the old school “Hulk vs. Thing” fights. Also, another Neil Gaiman project for Marvel next year. Good news also for the return of a “What if…?” series, X-Force, Nightcrawler, and Gambit. In the Ultimate Universe, we’ll see the origin of Dr. Doom and a second “season” of the Ultimates. Speaking of “seasons”, Marvel is trying that approach with their cult favorite, Runaways. If this works out well, I wouldn’t mind seeing this go into effect for some titles that don’t sell super good but still have a strong audience. Would you Spider-girl fans like to see that in order to stave off the always-present cancellation axe? Yikes, seems like Spider-Girl has other problems.

DC Comics will have new projects from Grant Morrison, a new Adam Strange series, new Manhunter series, and another crappy Chuck Austen storyline.

Yeah, much quieter convention for DC apparently. Not finding much news for them.

“I admit… I do miss the cape and the “S”, and this whole… bleeding thing is no fun.”