Well, at least if you want to curb your cussing.

You can send me a YouTube link and if I like it (or need it) enough to put it up here, Sock Point to you.

Feel free to send your suggestions to my gmail account. It’s woodmania. I’d type it out but I don’t need more junk mail. Just your YouTube suggestions.

I didn’t mean for this to become a weekly trend, but I once again end the week by saying farewell to something again. NFL Europa will be disbanded. From the World League of American Football to some teams in Germany, it’s been a decent 16 year run but the league has outlived it’s usefulness. The institution that brought us the helmet cam is shutting down. Kinda sad when football comes to an end. Even when it’s a so-so league that no one ever really watched and couldn’t watch today, even if they wanted to.

“Honey, I’m sure Europeans go to the bathroom.”

Well, it is now. This little service noted usage of the words “crap” and “death” but it wasn’t enough to push me towards a hard “R” like, I assume, Mr. Goat would be. I usually aim for a PG-13 with occassional drops of the word “shit”, but very few f-bombs. So, I am pleased that it’s not a restricted viewing. Maybe this program just checks your most recent posts and if you avoided too much cussing this week, you’re considered PG even if you have a history of “adult humor” and “mature situations.”

As usual, I stole this idea from Lefty. Why not, his site’s getting all tech-y lately so why shouldn’t I ride his coattails?

“Fix your boobs; you look like a bleedin’ Picasso!”

Twenty years after the Nokatomi Plaza was taken over by terrorists, John McClane returns for another big screen adventure today. By all accounts, a not bad Live Free or Die Hard. Which is nice to hear considering the trend of watering down franchises was a concern with this version being PG-13. I don’t know if I’m going to actually see the movie, but that’s probably more a reflection of me not going to the theater anymore than a statement about Die Hard 4.

In honor of today’s release, here’s a list of the best Bruce Willis roles. Believe it or not, Die Hard was not #1. An interesting take on why not, but when you get down to it: Die Hard made him as a movie star. The only role bigger of his was David Addison on Moonlighting. Well, it was pretty big for his career, that’s for sure. Any other suggestions is just out-thinking your list.

“Oh, that what now. I tell you what now between me and you. There is no me and you. Not no more.”

And I don’t mean player conduct policies. I mean actual stuff that’s really what I follow football for. Probably not. But it’s a long off-season and a look at the gridiron every once in a while is necessary. Even if it isn’t relevant. Training camp for the Bengals opens July 27. Some days that doesn’t seem so bad. Some days that seems very far way.

Here’s the first power rankings of the year. They say the Bengals are the 10th best team at the moment. Fox Sports agrees. I think I will, too. Number 10 sounds about right. This team has a lot going for it but some decent-sized question marks, too. How was your team ranked?

Right after the NFL Draft, a lot of your reaction was that the darn thing took too long. One immediate suggestion was moving the first round of the NFL Draft on Friday Night. That doesn’t seem too likely as TV folks don’t seem to like having events on a typically dead night for viewers. Maybe the league will cut the first round to ten minutes each. That seems more likely as every team that’s picking seems to use every minute they have, whether they need to or not. One thing’s for sure, the NBA’s Lottery inferior to NFL’s system. Although, that article may be outdated as it had more to do with the ping pong balls than this week’s actual player picking.

Oh, and did you hear that some rich guys are talking about starting another football league. Hmm… someone trying to compete head to head with the biggest thing in sports. Sounds like a bad idea? Sure does. Just ask Vince McMahon and NBC. Who knows, it might be better than NFL Europa for developing players. If these rich guys don’t bail on it before the first season is over like the most recent attempt to create an NFL rival, they might have something. Of course, working with the NFL might be the best way to ensure survival. If there’s one thing those guys love, it’s a type of minor league system that will develop players that the league doesn’t actually pay for.

“Oh my god… BITE SIZE SNICKERS?! That’s it! I’m calling Child Protective Services!”

Me, the lovely Lisa, and a few friends got a chance to check out a night at the local comedy club this weekend. I got a big kick out of the featured comedian, Ian Bagg. He’s not just a joke teller but really does a good job of incorporating the audience into the performance and giving it a personalized touch. I have no doubt that the 7:30 show was different from the 10:00 show. He draws from the crowd which is fun unless he saddles you with a nickname and refers to you as that for the rest of the night. Fortunately, I did not get picked on because I doubt I could handle being called “Nipples” all night like some unfortunate fellow.

“Yes, and let’s not forget the ever-cheerful wolverines, the Lon Chaney Jrs. of the animal world.”

If you haven’t heard yet from your local hack comedian-wannabe, another member of the Cincinnati Bengals was arrested last weekend. It was only a matter of time before this happened but someone finally got around to ranking the various Bengals arrests. For an out of town blog, not a bad job. I would switch Steinbach and Askew. I think the latter got tasered by police. That alone should put you into the Top 5.

Nothing new to add, really. Tough to come up with original material at this point. Hey, at least we don’t have Pac Man Jones and his 70 arrests.

“I know how this works. This is going to end with you and me running through the jungle screaming and crying. He catches me first because I’m heavy and I get cramps.”

In honor of Admiral Akbar Cereal.

Not impressed? You can send me a YouTube link and if I like it (or need it) enough to put it up here, Sock Point to you.

Feel free to send your suggestions to my gmail account. It’s woodmania. I’d type it out but I don’t need more junk mail. Just your YouTube suggestions.

“I need 20 CCs of medicine!”

Another Friday, another goodbye. This one much more permenant as Bob Evans passed away. Yes, that Bob Evans. I recently visitted where it all began in Rio Grande, Ohio. Obviously, the restaurant doesn’t look like the above picture anymore but the Bob Evans Farms are still in effect and there’s even a nice little museum for him. Here’s my pictures of Bob Evans Farms from just a few weeks ago.

A co-worker was sharing a few details about the man. Apparently, Bob Evans was one of the first KFC franchisees since he and the Colonel were tight. And Bob taught my co-worker’s wife the “proper” way to eat BE’s Chicken N Noodles. Next time I’m there, I’ll order that meal like I always do. But I’ll rip the biscuits in half and poor the soup over the biscuits. It’s the least I can do for a man who filled my belly so many times.

“When everything’s made to be broken I just want you to know who I am.”

It’s been a week since the Titanic Struggle of Death Star vs. Unicron was introduced and it seems like most of you sided with Palpatine’s big base. You are wrong. The answer is clearly Unicron. This guy has billions of years of experience, wiped out countless civilizations, and it took a race of giant robots to bring him down. Some farm kid blew up the Death Star. And the only body count it had was one race of pacifist wussies. Besides, the DS was mistaken for a small moon while Unicron eats entire planets.

As a result, those who picked Unicron get an extra point. Those who talked about unicorns will lose a point. Well, maybe not. I’ve never taken points away from people before and I probably shouldn’t start now. But all that unicorn talk was really lame, folks.

“Oh, oh…I’m sorry I thought my Dark Lord of the Sith could protect a small thermal exhaust port that is only 2 meters wide!”